its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize