And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
