I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
