think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
