I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
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