I CAN MOONWALK!
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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