maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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