All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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