Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Everyone says I win the strip club
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
