This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
