they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
