Pappa wants mamma naked
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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