pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
