guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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