If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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