Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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