You're completely useless in the revolution.
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
