Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
