I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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