dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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