Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
My dick has a subreddit
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
