mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
