i'm lost and i look like a hooker
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
