So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
