OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
