He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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