Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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