You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Randomize
