Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
