Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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