Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
