Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
