after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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