We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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