i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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