I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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