Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
