ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
