just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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