Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
