it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Randomize
