Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
