I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I need to sanitize my soul.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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