used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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