we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Then you guys just all showered together...?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
