what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Randomize
