the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
