so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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