no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
