dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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